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I really hope that this dizziness is because of codeine and lack of sleep, and not because of me doubling up on my lunchtime meds...

I don't *think* I doubled up. But even though I use blister packs, I am behind on lunchtime meds because I often miss them by mistake...so it's not impossible and after I took them before, I had a weird sense of deja vu.


Apr. 18th, 2017 05:31 pm
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Placeholder: I still exist.
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Another wafty day chez moi. Consider these posts to be placeholders. A reminder that I do still exist.

Although sometimes I don't know if it's better to quietly disappear until health returns or to continue being present. Disappear, and it might be that when/if you come back, no one will remember who you are. Stay present, and you might be able to do it only in such limited capacity that people have no sense of you anyway.

I'm really enjoying Words With Friends, it seems to be the one brain-thing I'm capable of these days. I fantasize about doing other things, but too many steps are required.

I have a pathology nurse coming around tomorrow morning to collect blood for tests for everything, I anticipate no surprises. Then I have homecare, which will be nice. Later in the day a Nice Young Lass(TM) will be coming by to see if she's the right person to help me out one or two hours a week. This isn't government funded, I'm paying for it myself. I want my fish tended, among other things.

I am really hoping that on Wednesday I am well enough to go to the birthday dinner of a very dear friend. I'll be sad if I can't go. I resigned myself to a solitary Easter, but this might be pushing it.

But I guess I've been here before.

Rolling with the punches.


Apr. 15th, 2017 04:36 pm
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My thanks to the person who gifted me a paid account for 12 months.

Unexpected and lovely.
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I'm feeling very quiet. I don't think I'm depressed as such, just feeling very passive.

I won't panic about it just yet.

It might be to do with my prednisolone dose, which went down to 7mgs yesterday. This is down at the level of physiological replacement dose only. So I have only got a minimal amount of cortisone in my system and we don't know if/when my body will decide to start making its own or not.

But I am knitting, feeding the animals, feeding myself, playing Words With Friends, collecting the mail. Maybe right now this is all I need to do.
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Sometimes I wonder how I would feel if all those things on the current to-do list were suddenly done.
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So here I am, sleepy as all get out, trying to get my act together.

Wait, I'm sure I've done this before.

The trying, that is. Not necessarily the achievement. Except occasionally.

I want to hang a bunch of pictures. I've got some lovely stuff but the actual business of putting it on the wall? Tricky. I have a drill, I have (discreetly) marked where the studs are, I have hooks and I have a brilliantly safe and sturdy ladder. What I don't have is someone to help me work out exactly where each picture should go before I start having at the plasterboard. I really need Eldest Brother for this. Not just for the physical side (because it's easier for him than me) but because he didn't get a degree in art without developing a very good eye for eye based things and is very helpful when it comes to deciding where things should go for best effect.

That last paragraph made perfect sense, I'm sure. I'm not going back to check for fear I might get lost.
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I am having such a good time sorting my yarn stash this week that it's almost embarrassing.


Mar. 7th, 2017 03:00 pm
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Stable enough, homecare has been and gone. Feeling cheerful.
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So apparently when the "Disable Auto-Formatting" box is ticked on Dreamwidth, I don't get paragraph breaks.

I'd never even really noticed that box before.

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I would really like to get a few things done. As in: finished!

I've got a few things going at the moment that I think of as nearly done but needless to say, that's never quite true.

Especially when knitting is involved.

Especially when you are knitting a circular blanket and each increase doubles the number of stitches per round.

Oh yeah, and I am knitting this circular blanket in order to use up some yarn I don't much like the colour of and will never use elsewhere, which looks like it now requires more yarn (of the same colour) to finish. And possibly needs to be entirely redone in order to look its best anyway.

I think I might take up origami.
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Getting home care is very good for me, and I do think it's fair and good that the dishes get done...except when I spend the next three days taking dry dishes out of the drainer to use and they're greasy. Or have gunge still on them.

I mean seriously, how have my carers not died of botulism yet? I've been rewashing as dishes are required, but as soon as I've got the energy I'll do the rest at once.

Or am I missing something. Beneficial health effects of retaining a coat of gunge on eating utensils?

Gut flora, but for crockery?

*shakes head in disbelief*
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Oh the endless daily grind of fending off dehydration.

I wish I was a camel.
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I just did a photo post on LJ. Teeny tiny trees.


Jan. 9th, 2017 01:46 pm
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A big old hug to whoever sent me the Winnie-the-Pooh book!

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I have some lovely, caring people in my life.

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I am starting to feel human again.
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The list of things I want to get done is expanding at an exponential rate. Learning and problem solving is so much fun.

And alas, even with careful pacing, it's not all doable.

Yesterday's batch of ice cream has turned out really well, I think I almost know how to do it.

Now having a go at lemon sorbet.
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There are too many things on my to-do list, and I really want to change the way my days go.

Priorities. I need some.

More spoons would also help, of course.
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Accidentally read until daybreak.


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